getting it together

I have posted several times about getting a handle on this hurricane called the Wilson household. Six people living under one roof, four being kids, is hard work. For so long I have been frustrated and have let so many things go. Tired of saying the same things over and over again. "Pick up your toys, clothes, dishes...trash!" Most of that falling on deaf ears until I am screaming at the top of my lungs. Then me defeated and just doing it myself. They broke me. Big Time!

Well, I am here to say, "No more!" This mama has turned a new leaf and it ain't going to be pretty...at first. I am picking myself up, dusting off, and laying down the law. Yes, you are probably thinking that it is long over due. Heck, I know it is. But as the saying goes...better late than never. I can be honest with all of you when I say that I had given up for so long. I had no idea what to do or how to get it together. Now I know:)

Our house got a thorough cleaning the weekend before last because I just couldn't take it any more. My husband deserves a clean house to come home to after a long day at work. I deserve not to work myself to death to have every thing I accomplished be destroyed after only an hour or two. My kids deserve to learn some responsibilities and appreciation for what they have.

So everyone has their own chores to do and items are picked up before bedtime. No longer am I the only one doing laundry or sweeping the floor. You make a mess...you clean it up. A good friend of mine had a great idea. She does it with her kids. I think my kids are the messiest eaters on this planet. It never fails that there is some spill on the floor after a meal. Multiple that by the three kids sitting there...yea...frustration level up.

Well, she said to give each of them an old toothbrush and spray the floor and tell 'em to get to work cleaning. Great idea. So that has been something we have been doing. Grape juice was spilled earlier and the twins were in trouble....I'm not going into details...but that was part of their punishment. Clean the floor *wherever there were spots* with toothbrushes. (I'm not that cruel to make them do the entire floor)So we are gradually getting some kind of order to this chaos over here.

I am hope full and encouraged...now I just need some accountability to keep it up.

not even close.....lol

OK, this post is mainly for my awesome mother in law, Susan. She has been getting the word out there for people to vote for my blog. She is the most wonderful, loving, encouraging MIL I could ever ask for. She is my biggest cheerleader and I love her.

Unfortunately.....the votes weren't even close to the winners. But I do have to say that most of them had all month to acquire votes. Oh well, the prizes weren't that good any way. *grin*

I didn't start this blog to win prizes or get hundreds of followers. Or to bestow my abundant amount of wisdom on you.(he-he)This is my journal, my way to vent, to let other wives and mothers know they aren't alone in there endeavors, and to glorify God in any and every way that I can....which isn't easy but so worth it.

So Susan, don't fret about the outcome of the blog competition. You worked very hard campaigning for you DIL and that makes me feel better than actually winning. I love you very much and am blessed to have you in my life.

blog nominated....wow...didn't see that coming

hi everyone. someone nominated my blog on this link below. i have no idea who did or why but am flattered:o). So if you enjoy my blurbs go vote. no pressure or any thing. but i do have to say that i NEVER win any thing when in a contest. lol.

http://bloginterviewer.com/page/2

i guess i should tell you to go to the link above, click on my blog and then you will see a vote now button. it took me a while to figure out how to vote*blush*.

overworked and underpaid

I have heard this many times from different people through out my 30 something years on this earth. I always thought that it only was meant for the 'business world' and not getting paid enough for the job done. Well it has recently been put on my heart that isn't entirely true.

I am a stay at home mom. I home school 3 out of 4 of my children. I try to take care of the needs of my husband, children and house. Most of the time I know I fall short and really struggle with that. I feel some what of a failure when things are chaotic and the house is destroyed, laundry is over flowing, dishes are in the sink calling to be cleaned, school work is put on the wayside, and the kids are turning deaf ears to my instructions. When my husband comes home and one or two things have been accomplished and his wife is a mess and almost in tears. Kids are running wild and.....well being kids.

I think of that saying so many people use. Am I overworked and underpaid for this 'job' God has blessed me with. Yes, you heard correctly...BLESSED me with. After the above paragraph I wrote I can honestly say that I am happy and blessed by my job. I have those days mentioned above and wonder if I am cut out for this. Then I am reassured when my kids tell me that they love me with a python hug and sweet kiss. Mo, my oldest, goes into her room and cleaning it when she knows that I am having an extra stressful day trying to get all my to do things accomplished. It makes me smile the moment I see all of my blessings sitting at the table helping one another with their school work. I especially feel overpaid when my husband comes home and smiles and gives me an appreciative squeeze for dinner being ready because he is starving.

Yes, I am overworked with the every day mundane tasks of being a SAH mom...well mom for that matter. But I wouldn't say that I am underpaid. My family pays me with their gratitude and affection. To be honest I do have those days when I feel burned out and underpaid, then one of my little ones comes up to me and tells me I'm beautiful, even in my old sweats, hair a mess, knee deep in dirty laundry. You see that is my job. To raise children to love no matter what or who you are. To help one another no matter what the circumstance. I could go on and on but you get the point.

Now in a few days or weeks I may come on here and post a venting rampage about a horrible, tantrum filled day when nothing got done or everyone one was in a bad mood and I need some mommy time....but that doesn't mean I have changed my mind. lol. Everyone has moments to regroup and take a few for themselves. I just need a listening ear to get it all out, get some perspective and remember why I do the job that I have.

never a dull moment

The last 2 days have been interesting to say the least. Even though I only had 2 of my 4 kids, we had 2 incidents more than normal. Yes, it wouldn't be the same if something didn't happen.

First of all Wednesday night Addison fell asleep in Todd's lap. No that isn't the thing I am referring to. I pick her up to take her to bed. I get her settled in and cozy under the covers. I turn to leave the room and spot it. Her and her 6 yo sibling had got into the maxi pads and stuck one to the wall. It was clean...I promise. And just to make it interesting they tie a yo-yo to it. I guess it needed some decoration or something. I am up for any thing now. I don't think they can top that one.

Yesterday, was not a funny one. Payton tells me that her younger sibling has drawn on the wall with marker. I go to investigate and Addison is rounding the corner because she heard the tattler. I couldn't miss the masterpiece. Dark blue scribbles outside our bedroom door. No it wasn't a small area by all means. This isn't the first time and I lost it a little and sent her to her room. Then I notice that there are 3 drawings of animals that Addison's 3 yo hand could not have done. So the tattler had told on her younger sibling to keep from getting into trouble herself. That did it. Miss Princess had a date with her room as well.

So the next 5 to 10 minutes I spend scrubbing their portfolio off the wall. Steam coming from my ears and trying not to get madder as I cleaned. (Well, my arms did get a good workout.) I just got frustrated because this isn't the first, second or third time they've done this. They always seem to find some writing utensil that I've missed putting away. Plus, my 6 yo knows better by now. Just needed to vent on that one. I guess I will end with the funny one next time. No I am not so naive that I don't expect something like this to happen again. Hopefully it won't be blue marker on a white wall.

score one for dad.....actually more than that

O.K. since yesterday's post was such a downer, I thought that I better do another one that is less depressing. I can't promise any thing. LOL.

I realized again how blessed I am last night. Unfortunately the twinkies got whatever Addison had the other day. Some kind of stomach bug. Thankfully it only lasts about 24 hours. That isn't the reason I am blessed. Todd is such a wonderful father. Payton got sick earlier in the evening while I was in the shower. By the time I was finished he had every thing cleaned up and had her sitting with him giving lots of loving. Score one for Daddy.

Later at bedtime, we got them all tucked into bed and started our night together. At around 11:45pm Jacob got sick in his bed. Todd jumped right in to help me. All right, not literally. Who would in that situation. Any way he got both twinkies out of bed because Payton was up by then. He cleaned our son up while I changed the sheets and gave them some water. We snuggled them back in to Payton's bed.

At around 2am, Jacob got sick again and he dealt with it. Then he tells me he isn't feeling too well himself. Way to go Todd, dealt with yucky stuff while he wasn't 100%. What a man! Well, at about 4:30 this morning my poor, wonderful, loving husband got sick.

Yes, it doesn't sound so great that almost everyone in this family is under the weather. But this wife and mama is thanking God that I have such a great family....especially my husband who would clean up 'you know what' while trying not to do the same.

I love you Todd! You are appreciated and loved very much.

crummy weather, crummy mood

It has rained here for 3 days. It is cold, wet and miserable. Kinda like my mood today. Every thing has rubbed me the wrong way. The normal goings on have irritated me and my patience has been worse for the wear. Poor kids. Poor hubby. I'll be honest, I can't stand myself today. That is sad. Am I alone in this? Can any one else relate?? I am pleading that someone else will say, "Girl, I have been there and done that?" Just so I don't feel like such a horrible wife and mom.

SNAP OUT OF IT!!

Addison turns 3

I am a little sad. Addison turned 3 years old yesterday. She is my last one and is growing out of the baby stage. Who am I kidding, she came out grown. This little person thinks she is a big kid. I guess since she has 3 older siblings that is to be expected.

The morning she was born, I remember the dr. placing her on my stomach and it was love at first site. Corny I know but oh so true. I told Todd that she didn't look like the other kiddos. YES, she looks like ME. I was so excited that one of them resembled me. I mean, come on, I do all the work and Dad gets all the glory.

Addison is such a character. Nicknamed Queen A (as in queen b) she tries to run the show...ok she does a lot of the time. One of her most used phrases is " you're not the boss...I the boss." I hear this often when she is playing with the twinkies. It doesn't help that they normally give into her. She is just too darn cute not to when she bats her eyes and looks all innocent. We are in trouble!!

We are blessed with the last addition to our family. She continuously makes us laugh and gives awesome BIG hugs. Happy Birthday Addison!! We love you!!

On Facebook of all places

Before I got out of bed this morning I had my quiet time. I have struggled with forgiving for about a year now. I just can't seem to let this go with this person. My head knows that I am to forgive as God does but my heart is bitter toward this person and what was done to me. So that was at the top of my prayer time. I desperately want to let this go because it is hindering my relationship with my Lord. I can't grow in my faith if this isn't resolved. Some times I feel consumed by it. I don't want to feel this way any more.

I asked God to give me a verse for what is going on with my forgiving. What is His take on all of this mess. I got up from bed and went on with my day not thinking that He would get back to me right then. You know that it could take some time when God is working on us.*grin*

Around noon I got on Facebook to check on everyone and my messages. As I am scanning over posts my eyes catch a phrase. "Has anyone hurt you???" Now usually I skip over that stuff but it was from a Christian site so I bit and went to the page. OMgoodness, as I read I knew that God had given me my verse. ON FACEBOOK OF ALL PLACES!!

"There is only one law giver and judge, the One who is able to save and destroy." James 4:12

Now the scenario of how that person was hurt was completely different than mine but the feelings were the same. As a christian, I know I am to forgive but my heart is not wanting to because of my hurt. It is not my place to judge this person or their actions. It is not my place to be judge, jury and executioner. That is then my sin!! I need to hand this over to God to handle and ask for mercy on that person. That is when my heart and head will connect to forgive.

Wow, I never thought in a million years that I would hear from God on Facebook. LOL. It is true that HE is every where but I have to chuckle about this one.

Making changes

They say it takes 3 weeks to make a habit. I am determined to make good ones this year. Our life around here is mostly chaotic. Which I hate to admit is a lot of my fault. I am the biggest procrastinator you will find and that isn't good. But at least I realize it and am working to change it.

I am GOING to have a schedule and stick with it! Yes, I know that there has to be some give and take on it since we do homeschool. That doesn't mean that it has to happen often and whenever I think I need an excuse to just be lazy.

The first weeks in January have been hairy. I will say that with the holidays and all the family being at my house has been part of it. I was ready to pull my hair out and scream like a maniac just looking around at the clutter and mess. I made a commitment a few years ago that I wouldn't continue screaming at the top of my lungs to get the kids to do their chores or whatever it was that I told them to do. I am ashamed to confess...it happened... too much for my liking.

So changes are coming in the Wilson house. Good ones. Yes there will be trial and error, maybe too many for my liking, but it will happen. I know not to set my expectations too high because it will not happen over night. There will be many tears and tantrums on both sides. So, feel free to ask how it is going. You may want to wait a month or more so you don't get you head bit off. *grin*

see you soon sister

Saturday was the one year anniversary of Gwen's passing. She was a wonderful caring person who wanted to take care of everyone. Sometimes neglecting herself. She was taken from this earth earlier than all of us wanted but God has given us a peace that passes all understanding. She is missed tremendously but we know that one day we will meet up with her again and rejoice in our Saviors love for us all.

I wish that I had a picture of her to post so that you all could see what a beautiful person she was not only on the inside. She had a smile that would lite up her face and make you smile too. We love her dearly and would liked to have her here for our own selfishness but know that there were reasons beyond us that her life was shorter that we wanted. May you rest in peace sister and we will see you soon.

a ray of sunshine

I decided I better do this now or it might be a day late. Then I would never hear the end of it from Morgan. My sweet sunshine is 13 years old today.

My pregnancy with her was uneventful but the delivery was a whirlwind and very quick. I remember thinking that we had plenty of time before she arrived. Morgan had other thoughts. A total of 4 and a half hours after the first contraction, she was here. Blonde hair and blue eyes looking just like her daddy. She was crying and the nurse bundled her up and gave her to me. She wiggled her hand out of the blanket and gave me a smack on the cheek. I passed her along to Todd and she immediately quit crying. That was it....daddy's girl all the way.

The time has gone by far too fast for me. My baby is a teenager now. What a beautiful young lady she is turning into. Embracing her title as first born oldest sister of 4. I really have no clue how I would get by without her. She is my sunshine. We nicknamed her that after she was born because her hair was so blonde, you couldn't tell that she had any. But that name means so much more now. Our ray of sunshine that is forever there. Our true gift from God, on lone to raise into a godly woman.

Happy birthday, baby!! We love you so much!!

I will worship while I'm waiting

I love that song. It is one that makes me want to raise my hands in worship and belt out as loud as I can and praise the holy One. If you know me....I don't call attention to myself and can't carry a tune. But I'll tell you a secret, I turn up the radio in the car and belt it out with that one. Sorry kids!!

It has been a rough road these past 2 years. Well, actually for many years it has but these past few have been a humdinger. I won't go into all the sob stories and be a Debbie Downer because if I let myself I can really wallow in my self pity. I don't want to do that. I want to worship my Savior and thank Him for all of the roads I have gone down and am still walking on. I want to keep my eyes on Him and Him alone. I know that He is with me always and that He is teaching me so many things if I just keep my mouth shut and listen.

I can look back and see the changes that have taken place...for better. I can honestly say that I am thankful for the many struggles I have gone through. I see the changes in myself, my husband, and my marriage. I feel my faith growing and my focus in the right direction. Don't get me wrong, I still have a ways to go. But I will worship while I am waiting for my savior to continue His work in me. I will worship and praise Him when our finances aren't enough, when my marriage can't take another blow, my kids are screaming and not doing what is asked, when the drama seems too much, or it's just one of those days that you just want to quit.

I will give thanks when all of our bills are paid and we have $3 in the bank. I will give thanks when Todd and I have an hour of quiet time together when the kids are tucked into bed. I will jump for joy when the kids are sitting at the table helping one another with school work. I will worship because I know that God is never leaving me. He will never give me more than I can handle. He is molding me to the person I am meant to be.

Yes, I am human, and my faith will stumble. I will crumble under pressure at times....OK a lot of times. But He loves me still and will help me get back on track if I only ask.


Thank you Lord for the time and work you are putting into me!

double belssings

In less than an hour will be when 2 of my 4 blessings came into this world. I can look back now and breathe a huge sigh of relief and see the wonder and awe of our precious heavenly father at work. Though it was a difficult pregnancy with emotional, physical and financial stress, it was worth every moment. Those two wanted to enter this world at 24 weeks and it took every thing we could possibly do to keep them in that cozy uterus for as long as we did.(almost 36 weeks) But only by the grace and mercy of God do we have 2 healthy, happy, loving, beautiful, thoughtful, rambunctous, bickering, tattling, comforting, cootie avoiding, booger picking, obnoxious talking, sweet, endearing, compassionate, and God loving twins.

Jacob and Payton are so special to us. When we planned on just one more to add to our family, God blessed us with double the blessing. We can't imagine our life without them. They each bring something different to our family. Unique in their own way, but sharing a bond only they understand. I pray that they will always feel that way toward one another.

Happy Birthday, Jacob! Happy Birthday, Payton! Happy Birthday, my twinkies! We love you so much and think you two are the coolest 6 year olds we know.

discovery toy party

Hi all. You are more than likely tired of hearing about Discovery toys, but if I want to sale I gotta get my info out there. I am having a party at my house on Saturday Sept 19 at 3 pm. If you are interested in attending and didn't get an invite in the mail, leave me a post and I will get back with you on directions. Would love for you to come. If you can't make it, you can host a party yourself with my help. Depending on the amount of money your party makes, you can earn FREE toys or half off. And if someone at your party signs up to host a party...more goodies for you. OK, that wasn't so bad was it. I kept it short and sweet.

another first

OK, some of you have all ready heard about this but I've been busy and haven't been blogging lately. Better late than never. And I am a bit embarrassed to spill the beans on this one. You may think I am a horrible mother that doesn't watch her child close enough.

Yes, it is about my adorable, funny, mischievous, sneaky, 2 and a half year old daughter Addison. It was probably a Saturday afternoon. We're all being lazy. Todd gave Addison a donut and she sits down in front of the tv to enjoy her treat. At some point I hear crunching. It is coming from 'the one I don't put any thing past any more'. I ask her what she is eating. She turns to me and opens her mouth. I don't see anything. We both go about our business. I hear the crunching again.

"What do you have in your mouth?!"

Todd, " I gave her a donut."

" NO that can't be, she's crunching."

So by this point she is hiding something behind her back. AAAHAA!! I get it away from her and let out an " oh no".

Todd asks what is it. He had to tell me the specific name because I had no idea. All I knew was that they normally put it in packaging and it specifically says DO NOT EAT. Silica Gel.

So I go on line and get poison controls number. Never had to call them before and our oldest will be 13 in December. So I get a really nice man and tell him the situation. He tells me that it is NONTOXIC....thank you Jesus...and to rinse her mouth out (all ready did) and give her some juice.

I am bracing myself for the next event that will add to my grey hair.

blurbs from the princess

**This picture has nothing to do with the post but it is one of my favorites**

A little girl handed down 2 bathing suits to Payton that she will be able to wear next year. But my princess loves clothes and is determined to wear the one that looks like Morgan's.

"Mom, my body has been hurting. Can I try on my bathing suit because I've had growing pains."

This is my 5 year old who is going on 16.

ER trip???

OK, this is the first for Todd and I with any of our kids. And leave it up to Addison to be the one to do it. I don't know if you can tell in the pictures but those two teeny tiny objects are plastic, flower beads for bracelets. I was out in the garage and Todd was inside with all four kiddos. When I returned I noticed Addie playing with something, picking at her ear...laughing. So after a second or two I asked her what she was doing.

"Ear mommy." was her reply. So if you know my youngest child you'd know why I automatically went into SEMi-panick mode. I look in her ear and see one of those beads. Great!! We inform Daddy of the situation and I get to work on figuring out how to remove the object. It is barely inside the canal but not easy to get. I am unable to retrieve it so Daddy tries. He is able to get it and figures he's done....

Well, Mamma wants to make sure Addie didn't put more in there. She tells me that yes, in fact, there is another bead. OK, this one might not be as easy to get because she shoved it more down to make room for the last one. I'm thinking we need to go to the ER so they can get it out. Daddy, the calmer one says no he can get it......if the 2 year old can only sit still long enough.

Yeah, daddy get's it lose and out. Thank you, Lord! Now I decide to REALLY look inside those tiny ears to make sure there isn't any thing else. NO, that's it....... until next time. Praying this is the last time.

a sign of healing

about a month ago we planted a rose garden in Gwen's memory. It is still a work in progress but we have 5 bushes and some big rocks bordering it. We have a cross with a scripture on it. Can't recall right now what it is..I'll post it later. We made a marker out of plaster of paris with her name on it. We want it to be a place where Krysta and JJ can go and just think about and remember their mom. Some where the kids and whoever else wants to go and maybe get a little peace from all that has gone on. Have some quiet time with the Lord and just rest in His knowledge of being together with Gwen one day. Mom called earlier and said that 2 of the rose bushes have blooms on them. It is a reminder that life goes on and there will be healing.

After we get some more done with garden I will post some pictures.

that girl!!

As I sit here checking my e-mail and catching up on blogs, J and A are eating lunch. J finishes his hot pocket and is enjoying his treat of gummy snacks. A hasn't ate one bite and isn't very happy that she isn't getting her gummies. I told her that she had to at least eat a piece of her lunch before she gets them.

This is her response, " I not like hot pockets. I NOT happy with you."

Couldn't resist posting that. My daughter is going to turn the rest of my hair grey.

Mean while she is laying on the floor saying, " I don't want hot pockets....gummies! "

The terrible two's have arrived.