Monday, January 18, 2010

Addison turns 3

I am a little sad. Addison turned 3 years old yesterday. She is my last one and is growing out of the baby stage. Who am I kidding, she came out grown. This little person thinks she is a big kid. I guess since she has 3 older siblings that is to be expected.

The morning she was born, I remember the dr. placing her on my stomach and it was love at first site. Corny I know but oh so true. I told Todd that she didn't look like the other kiddos. YES, she looks like ME. I was so excited that one of them resembled me. I mean, come on, I do all the work and Dad gets all the glory.

Addison is such a character. Nicknamed Queen A (as in queen b) she tries to run the show...ok she does a lot of the time. One of her most used phrases is " you're not the boss...I the boss." I hear this often when she is playing with the twinkies. It doesn't help that they normally give into her. She is just too darn cute not to when she bats her eyes and looks all innocent. We are in trouble!!

We are blessed with the last addition to our family. She continuously makes us laugh and gives awesome BIG hugs. Happy Birthday Addison!! We love you!!

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

On Facebook of all places

Before I got out of bed this morning I had my quiet time. I have struggled with forgiving for about a year now. I just can't seem to let this go with this person. My head knows that I am to forgive as God does but my heart is bitter toward this person and what was done to me. So that was at the top of my prayer time. I desperately want to let this go because it is hindering my relationship with my Lord. I can't grow in my faith if this isn't resolved. Some times I feel consumed by it. I don't want to feel this way any more.

I asked God to give me a verse for what is going on with my forgiving. What is His take on all of this mess. I got up from bed and went on with my day not thinking that He would get back to me right then. You know that it could take some time when God is working on us.*grin*

Around noon I got on Facebook to check on everyone and my messages. As I am scanning over posts my eyes catch a phrase. "Has anyone hurt you???" Now usually I skip over that stuff but it was from a Christian site so I bit and went to the page. OMgoodness, as I read I knew that God had given me my verse. ON FACEBOOK OF ALL PLACES!!

"There is only one law giver and judge, the One who is able to save and destroy." James 4:12

Now the scenario of how that person was hurt was completely different than mine but the feelings were the same. As a christian, I know I am to forgive but my heart is not wanting to because of my hurt. It is not my place to judge this person or their actions. It is not my place to be judge, jury and executioner. That is then my sin!! I need to hand this over to God to handle and ask for mercy on that person. That is when my heart and head will connect to forgive.

Wow, I never thought in a million years that I would hear from God on Facebook. LOL. It is true that HE is every where but I have to chuckle about this one.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Making changes

They say it takes 3 weeks to make a habit. I am determined to make good ones this year. Our life around here is mostly chaotic. Which I hate to admit is a lot of my fault. I am the biggest procrastinator you will find and that isn't good. But at least I realize it and am working to change it.

I am GOING to have a schedule and stick with it! Yes, I know that there has to be some give and take on it since we do homeschool. That doesn't mean that it has to happen often and whenever I think I need an excuse to just be lazy.

The first weeks in January have been hairy. I will say that with the holidays and all the family being at my house has been part of it. I was ready to pull my hair out and scream like a maniac just looking around at the clutter and mess. I made a commitment a few years ago that I wouldn't continue screaming at the top of my lungs to get the kids to do their chores or whatever it was that I told them to do. I am ashamed to happened... too much for my liking.

So changes are coming in the Wilson house. Good ones. Yes there will be trial and error, maybe too many for my liking, but it will happen. I know not to set my expectations too high because it will not happen over night. There will be many tears and tantrums on both sides. So, feel free to ask how it is going. You may want to wait a month or more so you don't get you head bit off. *grin*

Monday, January 11, 2010

see you soon sister

Saturday was the one year anniversary of Gwen's passing. She was a wonderful caring person who wanted to take care of everyone. Sometimes neglecting herself. She was taken from this earth earlier than all of us wanted but God has given us a peace that passes all understanding. She is missed tremendously but we know that one day we will meet up with her again and rejoice in our Saviors love for us all.

I wish that I had a picture of her to post so that you all could see what a beautiful person she was not only on the inside. She had a smile that would lite up her face and make you smile too. We love her dearly and would liked to have her here for our own selfishness but know that there were reasons beyond us that her life was shorter that we wanted. May you rest in peace sister and we will see you soon.